Jesus Walks
Verse 1:
E D/B
Lame children racing wheelchairs,
E A/C A
Blind men with their empty stares
Can the addict ever free his veins,
Seems tragedy is our verse, loss our refrain
Will there be a day when the Kingdom comes,
When the sightless see and the legless run?
How can heaven belong to the poor?
Why does the rich man thirst for more?
Chorus:
E
I walked these City streets,
I walked bitterness and pain
A
Put all your wounds before me,
from the dead comes life again
E
My hands are achin' beside me,
these holes you see right through
A
I'm walking here beside you,
Just change your point of view
Verse 2:
E D/B
Feel me strong and taste me sweet
E
I'm coming to the rescue,
A/C
This work I will complete
Lift your head, look around you,
at the mountains and the plains,
In the field the farmer's workin',
at the playground children play
Come within and find me,
come find what's in store
Your heart is surely aching,
But my spirit's at your door.
The harvest's seed's in the air,
watch the Kingdom come again
Watch the temple rise before you,
like that Day in Jerusalem
Bridge
Sometimes I hear
And don't believe my ears
Can it be that the day
I've been dreaming of is here?
Save me from my disbelief o God
And rescue me from my tears
If the kingdom is coming,
let it come, let it be here!
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Jesus Walks (first draft)
Lame children racing wheelchairs,
Blind men come and go with empty stares
Will there be a day when the Kingdom comes,
When the sightless see and the legless run?
Why God, can't the addict free his veins,
Why does the homeless man look in vain?
I walked these City streets,
I walked bitterness and pain
Put all your wounds before me,
from the dead comes life again
My hands are achin' beside me,
these holes you see right through
I'm walking here beside you,
be still I know your sorrow
Come within and find me,
come find what's in store
Don't be hesitatin',
my spirit's at your door.
Feel me strong and taste me sweet
I'm coming to the rescue,
Soul's rest and heart's retreat
Lift your head, look around you,
at the mountains and the plains,
In the field the farmer's workin',
at the playground children play
The harvest's seed's in the air,
watch the Kingdom come again
Watch the temple rise before you,
like that Day in Jerusalem
Blind men come and go with empty stares
Will there be a day when the Kingdom comes,
When the sightless see and the legless run?
Why God, can't the addict free his veins,
Why does the homeless man look in vain?
I walked these City streets,
I walked bitterness and pain
Put all your wounds before me,
from the dead comes life again
My hands are achin' beside me,
these holes you see right through
I'm walking here beside you,
be still I know your sorrow
Come within and find me,
come find what's in store
Don't be hesitatin',
my spirit's at your door.
Feel me strong and taste me sweet
I'm coming to the rescue,
Soul's rest and heart's retreat
Lift your head, look around you,
at the mountains and the plains,
In the field the farmer's workin',
at the playground children play
The harvest's seed's in the air,
watch the Kingdom come again
Watch the temple rise before you,
like that Day in Jerusalem
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
What it Means to be Human
My best and most formulative views of “what it means to be” human beings has been gifted to me by great thinkers such as Desmond Tutu, Martin Luther King, Henri Nouwen, Oscar Romero, and Jean Venier. I hope everyone is familiar with at least some of these names, all of them deserve everyone’s time and attention.
For the first issue, the aspect of beauty and creation, and furthermore our own compulsion to create, I have been involved heavily as of late with building landscape models, you know mountains, forests, fields, and deserts? It’s kind of a strange thing, but I love the feeling of a job well done, a small, miniature world that is in my hands, on my fingertips, getting me messy and involved. I feel the echo of a need of God’s own heart. The contours of every piece of terrain, of the shades and textures of color, the very majesty of some form of plaster and clay. It is the same to a certain extent for all the fine arts, an echo of the echo of God’s beautiful creation. This doesn’t necessarily mean landscapes and animals; it covers the whole gamut of human expression, from anger to shock to serenity. The focus and purpose of these works can be rooted sometimes in sin, but the very impulse belies the hidden visage of God. In my own creative acts, the circle is complete. I, the image of God, not only is created, but desires to create. “Seeing in a mirror dimly.” As Wright explains in chapter four, on beauty, there is this “transience” we sense and feel: that is exactly what I mean by seeing in a mirror dimly. Perceiving but not fully realizing.
As I had mentioned in my first post, we in the Western world stress an individual idea of ourselves over the image of a social selves. Sure, we know we need human interaction, but fundamentally we see our society as an expression of ourselves, in other words rooted in each of us as separate people, not a group. Which is actually very stressful to our hearts. We have such deep existential problems because sometimes we see the need to “find ourselves” away from others, in solitude or in retreat. In reality what our hearts are designed to need and crave are definitions others put on us. We our defined as people by how we interact with others. Being human means necessarily to be in relationship. As Wright says: “Without human society, they don’t know who they are anymore. It seems that we humans are designed to find our purpose and meaning not simply in ourselves … but in one another and in the shared meanings and purposes of a family, a street, a workplace, a community, a town, a nation” (31).
To keep renewing this community is where the principles of forgiveness and reconciliation are introduced, and is why they are so important. And in comes justice. “Just”: to make things right again. Justice has much to do with the above issue of relationships and society because justice means a rightness in relationship. Desmond Tutu, in the aftermath of apartheid in South Africa, formed the “Truth and Reconciliation Commission.” He hypothesized that justice was more than retribution, but a restoration of righteousness. When we move towards that goal then we a become more fully human. Tutu addressed the paradox of reconciliation, that yes a wrong has been committed, and also, yes, we need to carry on from it. A paradox yes, but a necessary one!
Spirituality is a revelation, as Wright discusses in quite some detail in the chapter on worship. He delves into the memoirs of John and the things he witnesses of God while imprisoned. Worship is simply an assignment of value. We as humans will always have items we value, hence we will always be worshipful. The real choice is in being empowered through what we worship or being enslaved. Having freedom is a part of what it is to be human. If we choose gods that enslave us, then we do lose our humanity. Spirituality is not just its own distinctive thing on this list for discussion, it applies to every one of these issues of justice, beauty and relationship. The visions of John revealed a sacred, eternal drama that was being played out in these awesome elements of symbol and ritual. We are all central pieces in this drama! It a story bigger than our own. Our placement within this grand story is of prime importance, and we determine this placement to an extent: to walk on God’s side or our own. This story is who we are, and this story is the supernatural, the other, the spiritual.
For the first issue, the aspect of beauty and creation, and furthermore our own compulsion to create, I have been involved heavily as of late with building landscape models, you know mountains, forests, fields, and deserts? It’s kind of a strange thing, but I love the feeling of a job well done, a small, miniature world that is in my hands, on my fingertips, getting me messy and involved. I feel the echo of a need of God’s own heart. The contours of every piece of terrain, of the shades and textures of color, the very majesty of some form of plaster and clay. It is the same to a certain extent for all the fine arts, an echo of the echo of God’s beautiful creation. This doesn’t necessarily mean landscapes and animals; it covers the whole gamut of human expression, from anger to shock to serenity. The focus and purpose of these works can be rooted sometimes in sin, but the very impulse belies the hidden visage of God. In my own creative acts, the circle is complete. I, the image of God, not only is created, but desires to create. “Seeing in a mirror dimly.” As Wright explains in chapter four, on beauty, there is this “transience” we sense and feel: that is exactly what I mean by seeing in a mirror dimly. Perceiving but not fully realizing.
As I had mentioned in my first post, we in the Western world stress an individual idea of ourselves over the image of a social selves. Sure, we know we need human interaction, but fundamentally we see our society as an expression of ourselves, in other words rooted in each of us as separate people, not a group. Which is actually very stressful to our hearts. We have such deep existential problems because sometimes we see the need to “find ourselves” away from others, in solitude or in retreat. In reality what our hearts are designed to need and crave are definitions others put on us. We our defined as people by how we interact with others. Being human means necessarily to be in relationship. As Wright says: “Without human society, they don’t know who they are anymore. It seems that we humans are designed to find our purpose and meaning not simply in ourselves … but in one another and in the shared meanings and purposes of a family, a street, a workplace, a community, a town, a nation” (31).
To keep renewing this community is where the principles of forgiveness and reconciliation are introduced, and is why they are so important. And in comes justice. “Just”: to make things right again. Justice has much to do with the above issue of relationships and society because justice means a rightness in relationship. Desmond Tutu, in the aftermath of apartheid in South Africa, formed the “Truth and Reconciliation Commission.” He hypothesized that justice was more than retribution, but a restoration of righteousness. When we move towards that goal then we a become more fully human. Tutu addressed the paradox of reconciliation, that yes a wrong has been committed, and also, yes, we need to carry on from it. A paradox yes, but a necessary one!
Spirituality is a revelation, as Wright discusses in quite some detail in the chapter on worship. He delves into the memoirs of John and the things he witnesses of God while imprisoned. Worship is simply an assignment of value. We as humans will always have items we value, hence we will always be worshipful. The real choice is in being empowered through what we worship or being enslaved. Having freedom is a part of what it is to be human. If we choose gods that enslave us, then we do lose our humanity. Spirituality is not just its own distinctive thing on this list for discussion, it applies to every one of these issues of justice, beauty and relationship. The visions of John revealed a sacred, eternal drama that was being played out in these awesome elements of symbol and ritual. We are all central pieces in this drama! It a story bigger than our own. Our placement within this grand story is of prime importance, and we determine this placement to an extent: to walk on God’s side or our own. This story is who we are, and this story is the supernatural, the other, the spiritual.
Worship and the Story that Goes With It
What is worship?
Gosh, another topic that’s been tackled probably much better than me by other more intelligent people. What many have already related is that the definition of worship need not be narrowly defined within a religious space, although that is what it has been. The meaning of worship is simply a placement or stress of value. The thing which is most important to a person is by definition what that person worships.
Biblically, the gospel of John chapter one states clearly that: “Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.” What you worship draws you near to it. One or the other, God or godlessness, will ultimately take you up into it and transform you. What is also significant is that worship is a choice and that that choice is exclusive. Wright’s two rules: “You become like what you worship” and, (if directed at God) “worship makes you more truly human” is something I could not have said better (Wright, 148). What you see as valuable is what you align yourself with. There is only one thing humanity reflects, and so there is only one thing that can make us more truly human: God.
Wright’s chapter on worship is invaluable to this conversation. (While relating worship to a world-class concert) “What happens … is that everyone present feels as though they have grown in stature. Something has happened to them: they are aware of things in a new way; the whole world looks different. It’s a bit like falling in love” (Wright, 147). Falling in love is such a fitting and beautiful way of describing the process of worshipping God.
Worshipping to our fullest and in return being filled requires our utmost selves. Our truest selves, as we have discussed doggedly, is caught up in the fact that both we and God are creative. Music is parcel to that creativeness and richness. Music is but one element under the broad and wonderful category of creation. One of the best reasons for the worth of music in a worship setting is that done properly it unifies us, a prayer full of drama and suspense performed corporately. This corporate performance is crucial to our identities and to the ability of us to tell the Biblical story engagingly as a body.
Which leads us to the Story itself. As Wright says in his portion dedicated to Scripture, the story the Bible tells is essential. The Bible provides a history and a catalogue of God’s activity among humanity. The Bible provides definition and authority to the mystery of humanity’s source and destination. It provides a setting and niche for God’s work to take place. “Christian worship is praise of this God, the one who has done these things” (Wright, 150). The gift of praise lifts up and exalts God, but not any god. It is the God of the story we have received. We can only praise the proper God within the proper story. Our humanly praise acts as a signpost to the Kingdom and the Kingdom story.
How should it affect us? Humility, humility, humility! When we stand as specks underneath the majestic and vast sky of God’s creation and story, as part of a bigger picture and larger story, we find our own rightful place: as servants. Without the story and without setting our sights on what is truly worth being praised, we become central. When the leaders of worship see fit to mold the experience entirely around themselves and with themselves they make it a smaller space for everyone. We grudgingly push out any outside movement or energy in favor of a time and space we are in control of and in which we are most comforted. Instead of, as Wright put it, making us “grow in stature,” we shrink in on ourselves and become inbred and ultimately self-worshipping. We are simply setting up ourselves as some petty usurpers sitting on a throne soon to be occupied by a much greater Lord.
Gosh, another topic that’s been tackled probably much better than me by other more intelligent people. What many have already related is that the definition of worship need not be narrowly defined within a religious space, although that is what it has been. The meaning of worship is simply a placement or stress of value. The thing which is most important to a person is by definition what that person worships.
Biblically, the gospel of John chapter one states clearly that: “Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God.” What you worship draws you near to it. One or the other, God or godlessness, will ultimately take you up into it and transform you. What is also significant is that worship is a choice and that that choice is exclusive. Wright’s two rules: “You become like what you worship” and, (if directed at God) “worship makes you more truly human” is something I could not have said better (Wright, 148). What you see as valuable is what you align yourself with. There is only one thing humanity reflects, and so there is only one thing that can make us more truly human: God.
Wright’s chapter on worship is invaluable to this conversation. (While relating worship to a world-class concert) “What happens … is that everyone present feels as though they have grown in stature. Something has happened to them: they are aware of things in a new way; the whole world looks different. It’s a bit like falling in love” (Wright, 147). Falling in love is such a fitting and beautiful way of describing the process of worshipping God.
Worshipping to our fullest and in return being filled requires our utmost selves. Our truest selves, as we have discussed doggedly, is caught up in the fact that both we and God are creative. Music is parcel to that creativeness and richness. Music is but one element under the broad and wonderful category of creation. One of the best reasons for the worth of music in a worship setting is that done properly it unifies us, a prayer full of drama and suspense performed corporately. This corporate performance is crucial to our identities and to the ability of us to tell the Biblical story engagingly as a body.
Which leads us to the Story itself. As Wright says in his portion dedicated to Scripture, the story the Bible tells is essential. The Bible provides a history and a catalogue of God’s activity among humanity. The Bible provides definition and authority to the mystery of humanity’s source and destination. It provides a setting and niche for God’s work to take place. “Christian worship is praise of this God, the one who has done these things” (Wright, 150). The gift of praise lifts up and exalts God, but not any god. It is the God of the story we have received. We can only praise the proper God within the proper story. Our humanly praise acts as a signpost to the Kingdom and the Kingdom story.
How should it affect us? Humility, humility, humility! When we stand as specks underneath the majestic and vast sky of God’s creation and story, as part of a bigger picture and larger story, we find our own rightful place: as servants. Without the story and without setting our sights on what is truly worth being praised, we become central. When the leaders of worship see fit to mold the experience entirely around themselves and with themselves they make it a smaller space for everyone. We grudgingly push out any outside movement or energy in favor of a time and space we are in control of and in which we are most comforted. Instead of, as Wright put it, making us “grow in stature,” we shrink in on ourselves and become inbred and ultimately self-worshipping. We are simply setting up ourselves as some petty usurpers sitting on a throne soon to be occupied by a much greater Lord.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
A Christian Worldview
The nature of God: one of the most significant statements about God is that he is love. God is love. The idea of love in the secular world has of course been associated with some sort of emotional romanticism, but nevertheless, we have to pursue the truth of God as love. God’s love has held true throughout the Bible, in his personality and in history. God is love because he is a Person who has been constantly in loving relationship, first within the Trinity, secondly with the world and man. He is the epitome of agape love. Through that love he made all of the good things of the earth and desires the good for us in all things, using both hardship and our success to benefit us and further his Kingdom. His position of ultimate love is the one we seek in our relationships, what we see through the beauty of creation, the unity we seek to find in spirituality, and the perfect form that creates the vision of justice.
The Fall: A descent from the glory and clear vision of God that we once possessed as human beings, a time we can’t even remember. This loss of vision is what one of the key elements of the Fall. Humanity loses its sight of God, and therefore, visibility of our guidance and foundation. To put it in the terms of Wright’s book, namely the four echoes of God, the effect it had on us, humanity, was first to lose sight of our deep spirituality, a realm beyond our physicality, misunderstanding it and in some cases completely denying it. Secondly, we lose the vision of what relationships should be and is made to be. This directly affects justice. Justice is never simply an objective goal, it is a rightness in relationship, a harmony and coherence. All that is mentioned is not simply horizontal, such as with our fellow humans, but also below with the Earth and creation, and upwards, to God the Father. The aspect of beauty calls our souls back to a “better place,” like lost memories twitching in an amnesiac’s brain.
The role of God’s kingdom is a renewal, a rebirth of our vision, like a new lens being put over our eyes in order to put all the images in their right place and shape. The trick of course is that we are in the middle of this renewal. We are nowhere close to our final transformation. The Kingdom of God goes beyond repairing our vision. The Kingdom frees us to follow the powerful master that will see it through to its ultimate redemption. We don’t simply see things rightly, we belong to the one who will actually make it right. Through the leading of scripture and prayer, we are slowly (painfully it seems) relearning what it means to be human. It opens up our ability for compassion, mercy, and reconciliation through forgiveness. The very definition of this new sort of vision and power is Jesus Christ, who demonstrated the new humanity through his own life. The Kingdom is made of people who have been redeemed. The people of the Kingdom are not gatekeepers or guardians to the Kingdom. Entrance is gained at the core of each person’s heart, the people of God simply give evidence of such an entryway and act as signposts to it.
In the present state of human history, the process of our redemption is still in the works. The strokes of the brush are still coming down on the canvas. The ending masterpiece will mean that we become who we should be, the four echoes of God become visible to our very waking eyes: a tangible reality. The end, in my mind, is nothing like the “pie in the sky” view that discards our physicality. This is actually something I am still getting my mind around, the fact that the new heaven and earth won’t be a world of shadows or wispy clouds, but something as concrete as this keyboard beneath my fingers. We have fleeting glances at what the final Kingdom will look like, but in the end, our imagination is the best way to enter in, because the possibilities of complete redemption are so wonderful and magnificent we barely grasp them with the best of what we have to offer so far. The revelation of John surely attests to this fact, touching our wildest dreams. All I know: I can’t wait for it to come!!
The Fall: A descent from the glory and clear vision of God that we once possessed as human beings, a time we can’t even remember. This loss of vision is what one of the key elements of the Fall. Humanity loses its sight of God, and therefore, visibility of our guidance and foundation. To put it in the terms of Wright’s book, namely the four echoes of God, the effect it had on us, humanity, was first to lose sight of our deep spirituality, a realm beyond our physicality, misunderstanding it and in some cases completely denying it. Secondly, we lose the vision of what relationships should be and is made to be. This directly affects justice. Justice is never simply an objective goal, it is a rightness in relationship, a harmony and coherence. All that is mentioned is not simply horizontal, such as with our fellow humans, but also below with the Earth and creation, and upwards, to God the Father. The aspect of beauty calls our souls back to a “better place,” like lost memories twitching in an amnesiac’s brain.
The role of God’s kingdom is a renewal, a rebirth of our vision, like a new lens being put over our eyes in order to put all the images in their right place and shape. The trick of course is that we are in the middle of this renewal. We are nowhere close to our final transformation. The Kingdom of God goes beyond repairing our vision. The Kingdom frees us to follow the powerful master that will see it through to its ultimate redemption. We don’t simply see things rightly, we belong to the one who will actually make it right. Through the leading of scripture and prayer, we are slowly (painfully it seems) relearning what it means to be human. It opens up our ability for compassion, mercy, and reconciliation through forgiveness. The very definition of this new sort of vision and power is Jesus Christ, who demonstrated the new humanity through his own life. The Kingdom is made of people who have been redeemed. The people of the Kingdom are not gatekeepers or guardians to the Kingdom. Entrance is gained at the core of each person’s heart, the people of God simply give evidence of such an entryway and act as signposts to it.
In the present state of human history, the process of our redemption is still in the works. The strokes of the brush are still coming down on the canvas. The ending masterpiece will mean that we become who we should be, the four echoes of God become visible to our very waking eyes: a tangible reality. The end, in my mind, is nothing like the “pie in the sky” view that discards our physicality. This is actually something I am still getting my mind around, the fact that the new heaven and earth won’t be a world of shadows or wispy clouds, but something as concrete as this keyboard beneath my fingers. We have fleeting glances at what the final Kingdom will look like, but in the end, our imagination is the best way to enter in, because the possibilities of complete redemption are so wonderful and magnificent we barely grasp them with the best of what we have to offer so far. The revelation of John surely attests to this fact, touching our wildest dreams. All I know: I can’t wait for it to come!!
Friday, May 9, 2008
Recounting Blessings 5-09
Some singular experiences that have made my life so beautiful - I wrote these down in my journal this morning when I was recounting how blessed my day had been the day before, with so many good experiences and laugh-out-loud moments of joy.
(I have purposefully left out most of the names for various reasons, mostly just to be on the safe side)
-Playing Chess with my friend Dan, talking about everything under the sun
-Reading Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader to City of rest guys
-Helping with art class - drawing a dragon from The Dawn Treader, encouraging, giving ideas, my jaw dropping at some of the images or someone's creativity
-Saying "I love you" to Mama Gobe (the Pastor's wife at City of Rest) and eating her meals she offers me for free daily for working at the City
-Recounting game night, drinking Cream Soda with my friends while getting trounced in a game called Settler of Cattan and also chess
-Eating mango (nothing more be said)
-Inspiring others by playing music in the guitar, namely Sting and Shawn McDonald
-Teaching poetry and imagery, metaphor and simile to my friend, using ballads from Sting
-Forgiving someone who has hurt me then moving into friendship again - releasing wound-up feelings of grief and woundedness and separation
-Asking to be forgiven
-Watching Lighthouse girls give each other courage to stand-up and sing their musical creations
-Sharing a plate of fish and rice with Dan
-Sharing my day with my friend Katherine in a tightly packed poda-poda (the public transport buses) on the way home for the day
-Teaching someone guitar - over and over patiently bearing and correcting finger positions
-Watching a boy's eyes light up as I explain the story and imagery of the Chronicles of Narnia
-Clasping hands and greeting everyone at the City of Rest with a smile - even though there are those who don't acknowledge me
-Writing music with a woman and some other friends at the City
-Praying over a woman, with her hastily and unprofessionally attached IV bag, sleeping with high fever
-Seeing a man normally in complete psychosis smile back at me when I smile at him
-Playing my good friend in draft (a game very similar to checkers) ahnd watching him express himself in the only way that he can - through shadings and magnificent watercolors (I swear I'm going to set-up an art gallery in tribute to the man)
-Listening to Jazz
-Taking a cold shower after a long, hot day
-Kicking football around with a couple of boys from Lighthouse at the beach
-Watching the Zizer kids (the children of the family I live with) squeal in the break of a wave, threatening to knock them off their feet
-Laughing with hilarious abandon at my Lighthouse small group antics, especially with one of my friends (the loud Joseph for those who know him)
-Watching one of the goofier Lighthouse boys descend from his facade of seriousness into uncontrollable laughter snickering and then gut-wrenching laughter at the drop of a hat
-waking up to the sounds of birds and neighborhood life - not an alarm clock
-Coming home late to see the Zizer children passed out in any of the various positions they may have been in the midst of doing something
-Teaching a small boy at the City of Rest how to throw a paper airplane
...so many more blessings have been poured out on me while living and working here! god has made my life erupt with good things, if I can only live fully and lovingly for the rest of my weeks here... again, please pray for me
(I have purposefully left out most of the names for various reasons, mostly just to be on the safe side)
-Playing Chess with my friend Dan, talking about everything under the sun
-Reading Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader to City of rest guys
-Helping with art class - drawing a dragon from The Dawn Treader, encouraging, giving ideas, my jaw dropping at some of the images or someone's creativity
-Saying "I love you" to Mama Gobe (the Pastor's wife at City of Rest) and eating her meals she offers me for free daily for working at the City
-Recounting game night, drinking Cream Soda with my friends while getting trounced in a game called Settler of Cattan and also chess
-Eating mango (nothing more be said)
-Inspiring others by playing music in the guitar, namely Sting and Shawn McDonald
-Teaching poetry and imagery, metaphor and simile to my friend, using ballads from Sting
-Forgiving someone who has hurt me then moving into friendship again - releasing wound-up feelings of grief and woundedness and separation
-Asking to be forgiven
-Watching Lighthouse girls give each other courage to stand-up and sing their musical creations
-Sharing a plate of fish and rice with Dan
-Sharing my day with my friend Katherine in a tightly packed poda-poda (the public transport buses) on the way home for the day
-Teaching someone guitar - over and over patiently bearing and correcting finger positions
-Watching a boy's eyes light up as I explain the story and imagery of the Chronicles of Narnia
-Clasping hands and greeting everyone at the City of Rest with a smile - even though there are those who don't acknowledge me
-Writing music with a woman and some other friends at the City
-Praying over a woman, with her hastily and unprofessionally attached IV bag, sleeping with high fever
-Seeing a man normally in complete psychosis smile back at me when I smile at him
-Playing my good friend in draft (a game very similar to checkers) ahnd watching him express himself in the only way that he can - through shadings and magnificent watercolors (I swear I'm going to set-up an art gallery in tribute to the man)
-Listening to Jazz
-Taking a cold shower after a long, hot day
-Kicking football around with a couple of boys from Lighthouse at the beach
-Watching the Zizer kids (the children of the family I live with) squeal in the break of a wave, threatening to knock them off their feet
-Laughing with hilarious abandon at my Lighthouse small group antics, especially with one of my friends (the loud Joseph for those who know him)
-Watching one of the goofier Lighthouse boys descend from his facade of seriousness into uncontrollable laughter snickering and then gut-wrenching laughter at the drop of a hat
-waking up to the sounds of birds and neighborhood life - not an alarm clock
-Coming home late to see the Zizer children passed out in any of the various positions they may have been in the midst of doing something
-Teaching a small boy at the City of Rest how to throw a paper airplane
...so many more blessings have been poured out on me while living and working here! god has made my life erupt with good things, if I can only live fully and lovingly for the rest of my weeks here... again, please pray for me
Friday, May 2, 2008
Update 5-02
Last week was completely taken up by a series of seminars about "Children in Crisis" which went into a lot of detail about exploitation and the effects of trauma and mental stress on children in post-war environments. It was very helpful but also heart-wrenching, because we are living here among a generation of war-torn personalities and mentalities. Life here is hard, not for myself in particular, but just really for everyone who lives here. As the weeks wind down (I have less than 7 weeks), I am wondering how I will react in my own lifestyle and attitude when I get back to the States. Some days I am just craving for comfort in things familiar, unfortunately the things that are so familiar to me in the states are video games, movies and all the creature comforts. I hope I dont retreat into my comfortable, apathetic lifestyle when I return or it will be better for me to have never to come here. I feel a great burden of responsibility on my shoulders, but my Christ says that his burden is light. And this may mean that I have simply to live and influence the world in the small things that I may, even though they seem insignificant in view of larger, harder problems.
Pray for me to live open-handedly and generously, its so easy to continually live life grasping for whats your own and trying for absolute sovereignty over a place and time that is not my own - even my own life is not my own! Day after day walking past the beggars, cripples and blind men led by their children really can bring me down. There is no way I can lift them up, even if I gave all my money away. I have determined to only contribute to those I am in true, sincere relationship in, but that is so hard when the needs are so widespread and problems so multi-faceted and layered. I long for the kingdom to come, along with its justice, and it is come in the small community that I have found here. But it seems as though the church and the world have such a long way to go.
Please pray for me. I am hard pressed some of these days to see life positively, and the point was long past when there were easy answers. Living with the poor is impossible for me, with the prospect of returning home to the states and securing safety with a US citizenship, but I must attempt to bring their voices out of the depths of obscurity and into the spotlight of the church. It's time to stop witnessing to a kingdom of apathy and greed and start witnessing to the upcoming kingdom of peace, justice and love.
Remember the parable about the two armies. One saw the other coming and the wise commander sent his envoy far ahead, as to parley and make peace before the stronger army could come and overtake them. Lets start making peace with the onward coming kingdom and stop sitting on the fence, cherishing our ignorance about injustice, standing aside with hands raised.
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